When I was growing up, it seemed like a natural thing that I will get married and have my first child by 30 and watch my life evolve into marital bliss…Now at this present time, I find myself having different expectations and ideas that would have been strongly rebuked by my younger self. I am thinking of having my own child with the aid of a sperm donor. It won’t happen anytime soon but this idea no longer holds the same amount of repulsion as before. It seems feasible. What do you all think?
I know this is so personal and it may not necessary define and conclude me. But I guess as young adults, we will benefit from the exchange of views and considerations.
I have even given thought about my children’s names.
Boy: Gabriel so that he will grow up to be gentlemanly, refined and take care of the women in his life well (like his mum, aka me).
Girl: Alexis so that she will grow up strong and be successful in life, especially amongst the guys (you can tell I am a feminist).
Haha, suddenly I thought of something. If I do not know of the qualities of the donor, isn’t the birth of my child like opening a kinder surprise egg? Hahahhaa… madness.
2 comments:
Like you, I used to think that i will get married by 28 and have my first child perhaps within 3 years of marriage... Over the years and as i grow up, that mentality has changed and the thoughts go along the lines of there is no hurry to settle down cos well, there isnt any incentive for me to do so...; I'm still young; I'm financially independent and I can support myself; and being single means I'm getting lotsa freedom and I can do whatever I like/wish without having to consult your other half
Having own child with the aid of a sperm donor doesnt sound like a good idea for me... and I can imagine at least 4 big obstacles you will need to overcome... 1) Deal with the pregnancy by yourself, 2) Being a single mother and the challenges which come with it... career; responsibilites to take care and provide for the child alone; pressure from the stereotypes of unwed mother; etc... 3) Dating / Marrying someone whom you may meet some years down the road and all the worries of whether he can accept the fact that you already have a child, whether he will be a good father, whether the child likes him, etc... and 4) Explaining to your child the reason for the absence of his/her 'father'
I'm sure if you decide to opt for this, you will have to do your homework right? Definitely must do screenings for the donor, cos you wont want your child to inherit any genetic illness...
Anyway, FYI, IVF treatment is pretty costly (abt 7,000SGD per course) and with low success rate (abt 20%)... Thus i reckon you may need to set aside 20K in order to have your Gabriel or Alexis via this method
wow, thanks hua for the analysis of the obstacles ahead. you know, point 3 didn't occur to me until u mentioned it. i think i reckoned that if i have chosen this path, i have no intention of finding the special someone already. if he does barge into my life, then he either accepts gabriel/alexis or he can go fly kite.
still think i am too childish for such a big responsibility now. will reopen this option after my grad.
Post a Comment